There has been a catastrophic event! A meteor has struck your city!

By pure chance hitting near the local zoo. It has shatterred all the locks on the cages, releasing wild animals into the screaming crowds of city streets.

You find yourself and two of your man-hero buddies trapped in a dead end ally by 3 growling, snarling, blood drenched, zoo beasts.

You (as the leader of the group) have to pick which one you are going to tackle, leaving your buddies with the other two to defeat.

Do you:

• A- Wrestle the mighty Grizzly bear.
  

• B- Try to fend off a young wolf using a bin lid as a shield.
  

• C- Run away, because violence against animals is unkind and this is a silly test anyway.

WARNING!

Keep calm and choose carefully! Remember the “Chuck Norris-o-meter” can detect even the slightest flicker of fear!

LEGAL DISCLAIMER

*Please note whilst women are welcome to use MAN BUY, unless you really hate shopping this probably isn't for you.

This is the digital equivalent of an old shed, filled with jam jars full of screws, odd looking rusty tools, maybe a calendar showing December 2019, maybe a Corgi model car or old Hornby train set.

The floor has probably never been cleaned. It might not even have a floor, it might just be honest soil trampled like concrete by the long hard toil of working men.

Hidden amongst all this paraphernalia will somewhere be pictures of our heroes, man heroes!

Forget fancy suits, rippling muscles, or, glamorous surroundings! Those guys aren't heroes! Not man heroes!

Man heroes have names like Geoff or Bill, and forget flashy cars or fancy haircuts, these guys hold real wealth; a 50lb carp, a 1963 Hornby Bournemouth Belle model train still boxed, or, a toolbox filled with nothing but 10mm spanners.

Its a strange world ladies.

Enter at thy peril!

ALSO THIS:

The name MAN BUY, and implied restriction on male only usage is an artificial restriction intended solely for comedic effect.

Whilst at first glance it may appear to represent patriarchal sexist views, it is in fact a satirical comment on perceived sexual stereotypes.

One would hope that this would be obvious to anyone viewing this page. But, life has taught me that there’s always at least one person that somehow manages to take offence at everything ever said in the history of everything.

If at this point you still feel offended by this, then before you angrily complain please look up the definition of SATIRICAL first.

Maybe read a few books. Plays or the theatre may help too.

PS If you still think you’re right, and intend to prove you are right by getting your friend to agree with you, then don’t.