TRIPLE NEWS UPDATE: Zoas, New offers, plus Hermits!

Redesigned Zoa shop, NEW BIG FAT GOTH SALE offers, Plus Hermits go crazy!

TRIPLE NEWS!

ZOAS

New redesigned Zoa shop with Zoas now also viewable by price to make it asier to find the ones you want, plus NEW Jumbo button to make it easier to get to the Zoa shop.

BIG FAT GOTH SALE update

New offers added today, check them out. Some offers on critical stock levels now, so make sure you snap up what you want and complete checkout before someone else beats you to it!

AND FINALLY

Hermit crabs become latest HOT SELLER, following yesterday’s remarks by famous child Alex. It seems everyone wants to have Hermits, so they can be more like him!

IF YOU LIKE BIG BUTTONS

Then today is your lucky day! This giant button (see above) makes it easier to find your way to all our Zoas, comapred to the old smaller button (below).

New Layout!

The old style Zoa shop is still there, further down the Zoa page, but, at the top of the page it is now organised by price making it easier to see what you want. On a phone it won’t look much different to before, but, it’s massively different now on a pc. Check it out!

80+ Types of Zoa in stock!

We have (or had earlier today), 80+ types of Zoas in stock and online. As you can see they’re gettingsnapped up fairly quickly at the moment. They’ll also be some extra Zoas going online today and tomorrow, although almost all the new ones are online and getting snapped up already!

NEW OFFERS!

New offers online now, some more of the current ones sold out, and many more are about to. We’ll probably pull all remaining offers today/tomorrow or Monday, some offers will end earlier than that as I reduce stock down online to account for stuff sold in store. If you have something in your basket now, make sure you complete checkout ASAP, because when I pull the offers the stock is set to zero and you won’t be able to complete purchase on any expired deals. I’m thinning out some of the offers tonight, and most of the rest over the next 2 days.

The original photo for the graphic for the BIG FAT GOTH SALE.

The original photo taken for the BIG FAT GOTH SALE. As we didn’t have an actual big fat goth to use, we had to take this photo of the Hero sized James and then stretch it to make it fatter in the graphic.

EDITED BY PETER: That’s Bullshit Goodchild! Don’t listen to him people, the one in the advert is the original, and this one has been photoshopped to make him look smaller!

EDITED BY MICHAEL: I can verify I saw him shrinking the photo on the pc!

EDITED AGAIN BY PETER: I knew it!

Here is the photo being edited with background removed.

EDITED BY MICHAEL: Yeah Peter in the actual one his butt was wider than El Presidente’s jet. We had to put the camera in Panaromic mode to get it all in!

EDITED BY PETER:
* original picture
** after some compression already.

The finished graphics. EDIT BY PETER: The word “FAT” was actually painted onto the side of an arctic lorry trailer and parked in front of him. It was easy to do as it had just delivered his lunch.

Logo EDIT BY PETER, he think’s he’s Batman, and we often call him something similar, but, starting with an F.

OUR NEW CORAL GRADING SYSTEM

Here’s a link to a better explanation of our coral grading system, why we did it, and why it is so mental.

AND FINALLY

The FTSE soared today due to the rocketing value of hermit crabs. Yesterday famous child Alex said “I have one of those” and suddenly the world went Hermit crazy. Rumours abound that the Bundesbank in Germany have moved large amounts of their gold reserves into Hermnit crab shells as a good long term investment, also buying Money cowries at the same time. A spokesman from Bundesbank said:
”Something undeciperable in German, I don’t speak German”.

See all the new Zoas using our BIG BUTTON below. Just click it!